Sunday, December 01, 2024

Do You Take Children

The father of three called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room. The clerk told him that the rates depended on room size and number of people.
"Do you take children?" the father asked.
"No, sir," replied the clerk. "We only take cash and credit cards."

 


#joke #father

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Posted on 12/01/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;

Sunday, November 24, 2024

A car gets pulled over for inspection because…

A car gets pulled over for inspection because it's driving very slow on the interstate.

officer: ma'am, do you know how slow you were driving

woman: 25mph

officer: why were you driving so slow?

the woman: slow? There are signs everywhere that say I-25, so I was driving that speed.

officer: that's not a speed sign, it's the identification number of the interstate. license and registration, please.

As the driver reaches for the glove compartment, the officer sees the passenger sitting there, pale and shivering.

officer: are you okay? what's the problem?

passenger: we just got off the US-160

#joke #policeman

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Posted on 11/24/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;

Sunday, November 17, 2024

18 Lion Jokes, to Celebrate World Lion Day

Roaring with Laughter: 18 Lion Jokes to Celebrate World Lion Day on August 10th and Raise Awareness for Their Conservation

My grandfather has the heart of a lion,
And also a lifetime ban at the zoo.

 

What's the difference between a lion and a tiger?
A lion won't golf.
But a Tiger wood.

What did Spartacus say when the lion ate his wife?
Nothing, he was gladiator.

Why don’t lions like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!

How does a lion stop a video?
He presses paws.

How does a lion greet the antelope it meets on the savannah?
“Pleased to eat you!”

Why did the lion eat the tightrope walker?
He wanted a well-balanced meal!

What happened to the lion who ate the comedian?
He felt funny!

Why don’t lions play cards in the wild?
Because of all the cheetahs!

What do you call a slow and clumsy lion?
A snailion.

What do you call a lion powered by a battery?
A Li-on.

What does a lion call his barber?
His mane man.

What do you call a lion that has eaten your mother’s sister?
An aunt-eater!

What do you call a lion at the North Pole?
Lost.

What does the lion say to his family before they eat a meal?
“Let us prey.

” Why was the lion always invited to the party?
Because he was a real mane attraction! What do you call a lion that doesn't lie?
A not-lion.

What do Christian lions say before they go hunting?
Pray for your supper.

What do you get when you cross a lion with a snowman?
A cold snap.

What lion will never roar?
A dandelion...


18 Lion Jokes, to Celebrate World Lion Day
#joke #animal #tiger #lion #antelope #food #meal #sport #golf #hunting #short

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Posted on 11/17/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;

Sunday, November 03, 2024

The CEO calls a young employee into his office…

The CEO calls a young employee into his office.

CEO: When you joined the company, you were just an intern. Within a year, I promoted you from intern to associate, from associate to manager, and from manager to senior manager. I keep promoting you because I recognized your talent and hard work. Today, I’ve called you in to tell you that I’m preparing to promote you to vice president. Do you have anything to say?”

The young man replies, “Thanks.”

CEO: “Thanks? Is that really all you have to say to me?”

After thinking for a while, the young man finally spoke:

“Thanks, Dad.”

#joke

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Posted on 11/03/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;
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